Thursday, 19 September 2013

Permission to not do

Last week I was feeling so overwhelmed and anxious. I had a biiiiiiiiiigggggggg to do list. Which included writing a blog and sending my first newsletter. My mind was in complete chaos. I was feeling stuck and angry. Then later that day me and my husband went for our usual long walk and he could feel my anxiety. He told me "I think you work better without deadlines". OMG! Why didn't I realize this on my own! He was so right.

Now I don't know whether or not it is the same case with you. But, even if it isn't, ask yourself what makes you the most productive.

That night I just went to my bed and did my regular ritual of  affirmations and recalling all good things that happened during that day, and just slept off. Next day, I decided that I will do nothing until and unless I genuinely feel like it. I decided that if I don't feel like it I'll postpone my newsletter till eternity and same with the blog post. OK I am kidding, not eternity! But I gave my self permission to do whatever feels good, even if it means staring at nothing throughout the day or might be spending the whole day on Pinterest.

Just giving myself permission to take a break & permission to not drag myself into performing continuously, was magical!

I spent first few hours of the day just doing regular things but without any hurry. It is powerful to JUST BE.
I was feeling much better now, and I felt an urge to write my blog. So I wrote my blog and then published my newsletter as well. The work felt so peaceful, as if giving myself permission to not do filled me with energy to do.

My heart was till craving for more break and more of just being. So I listened and agreed to do so. Now it has been a week and I have only worked for few hours here and there and only when I felt good. And now I am back, feeling more energized to do my work in the world.

This whole thing was a reaffirmation that -
I am important. 
How I feel is important. 

It felt like self-love. It felt like freedom.

And this what I learned
- deadlines don' work for me
- always listen to what your heart is craving for
- take a break & give yourself permission to just be

Now it is your turn. What makes you more productive and makes your energy tank full? What is your heart craving for now (it might be work but it might also be taking a break)? Are you willing to give yourself permission to do whatever your heart is craving for?